I think it's about time I make an actual entry.

USC

I'm kind of sad too, just a bit, and it's raining like there's not tomorrow outside. I love rain. I hope it continues until I go to bed tonight, which will probably be earlier than usual.

I'm worried that the rain will knock out the electricity.

Maria feels really bad about her friend Scott... See, he isn't exactly alive. She had a great night, but someone who didn't know the whole story wrote in her gb 'i hope u hear from Scott soon' but, see, Scott died. They were really close, and that does kind of make me sad too.

Me, Ivan and her are in a chat, and it seems like... like we know each other better than we thought we did, it's always nice to have a circle of friends to talk to.

-you just said-

yes, real friends. I have real friends and that's a start. Soon enough maybe I'll be able to put my life back together, piece by piece and I can learn to live here.

Chris was online tonite (:-D) but it's like I think about him 24/7, he NEVER leaves my mind, never. I'm such a loser. We had another fightish chat, but since I hadn't talked to him in a while i just sat there like 'yep. uhuh. be mad, go ahead" and eventually it went away.

He's so cute;-), and i wish I'd never made fun of him with Ivan! I'm so evil!

SC

Okay, Lisa is in mixed. I feel really, really bad for her, sort of. Goodness knows who will be in my team, i hope I won't get too many formerly-mixed team losers, like Courtney.

Gosh, I have to call Nikki. i told her I would, she's probably in Maroon anyway, she gets such good grades. Ashley called me today- I wonder where she got my number? But she's in maroon, o well. Allie is in Gray- Yesss!! this is going to be a fun year, I hope we're in math with Elliott again, that'll be so hilarious!!

I wonder what team Ari's in.

I hope Nichole and Meghan Reed are on mixed. they're some of the reasons i didn't like school.

But Chris rhoeber is on mixed, a small problem solved. As far as I can remember, neither Nichole or Meghan were very smart, so I think I may be in luck.

I wish Hanan didn't move. she was one of the only not stuck-up people and a very good friend. I remember having like hour-long convos with her at the basketball court- I kinda miss her! *sniff*

I don't really miss Brittney V, God knows where she is now. I wonder if she'll stay in Altoona and if she comes back she'll be in mixed for sure.

Mom got me this modeling book thing, about elite and stuff, i'm going to read it tonight.

I really want to be a model, and somehow, someday I'll make it happen!

Mom also got the next Rita Mae Brown book in the cat murder series, I still have to finish Pay Dirt and read Murder She Meowed. THEN I can read the next one. Last time I checked I was ahead of mom! Well, never mind!

My hair- I just have to say - looks way amazing. It's half up half down in a messy bun, but it looks cool that way! Kind of like the 'messy, I don't care, but I DO look gorgeous anyhow" look.

I don't know what I'm going to wear on the first day of school- i knwo what I'm going to wear to the orientation thing, my Delia's jeans and some sort of amazing top.

But to the first day- argh, I don't know! Pants or shorts? I don't have any cool shorts, so pants? Where did my capris go anyhow? And those black ones are NOT first day material. I'll think of something!

I't so weird how Ivan makes fun of USC Chris all the time. And it, like, sours how I see him (chris) And i wish he wouldn't, because chris is really cool if you get to know him (I know, i know, you don't want to)

and they keep saying how easy it is.

PPR9914: can we not make fun of chris please?

PPR58: i'm not

iAMaMISFIT13: it's so easy though

PPR9914: I'm in an 'i love chris' mood

PPR9914: so no making fun of him

iAMaMISFIT13: ok

PPR58: lol, i know what u mean ivan

PPR9914: guys....

iAMaMISFIT13: yeah

PPR58: yea

PPR9914: come on, what if i made fun of carrie or jon?

iAMaMISFIT13: i know

PPR58: I'D HURT YOU!

PPR58: anyway...

iAMaMISFIT13: it wouldn't be cool

iAMaMISFIT13: and i'd break yur arm

PPR9914: well, yea!

iAMaMISFIT13: with a BIG stick

PPR9914: so shut up okay?

PPR58: don't hurt me! ok!

iAMaMISFIT13: maybe your head too

PPR9914: I didn't yet but i might if you keep doing that.

PPR58: "for those of us whose love is far, far away. It kills, but it helps to know we're not along in our..

PPR9914: what??

PPR58: ..long distance loving"

PPR9914: the point is just stop!

Gosh why do they always do this? See they'd be mad if I made fun of *Carrie* or *Jon* neither of which i know, but in my mind I see Carrie as another Allie (from my camp) and Jon as another... well, sweet heartbreaker.

But I think I like jon more than carrie. maybe because we hear more about him, Carrie's like not there anymore.

Oh, on vacation. right. Ivan's so lucky, his relationship is actually stable, unlike mine which is barely even there and it's so rocky and bumpy sometimes I don't even want to be invovled. Why do we fight so much? I don't want to fight with him!

And Maria- well, Jon makes her so happy and that's such a good sign. I can barely remember when Chris made me that happy, for real

I feel like I am forcing myself to believe he still makes me that happy.

But anyway, This is droning on and on, I don't want to finish it bu people want to read! finally, a real entry!

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