I feel kinda seperated from myself, or from the stuff I used to do anyway... I'm at the library... I had a sucky morning, thank goodness it's almost five... dad is coming at 5:15... I can go home, I think I'll rent some books to keep my mind off things,I think I'm sick... had a headache all day, then those little kids! Grr! Abbie and I left class early... I have no idea what she said to the teacher for us but it worked,... hehe...

Yes, books.

this morning sucked... I woke up with a horrible, horrible headache, went downstairs- oh right! Lauren called me, Conor didn't come home last night after Players... but Ben told me that he went to Justin's... so it's okay... good, good..;-)

The phone rang again arpund 11ish... Teddy picked up, it was mom... she said she was coming to take him to Applebee's in Altoona... first off, I wondered who was taking me to art class, and also, noone ever takes me to Altoona for lunch, why Teddy? I called her back and she said dad was taking me to class, and about the Teddy thing, all she said was "Oh, I just like him more-"

Damnfuckshit, she always says that and IKNOW she's kidding but it gets on my nerves, and I almost cried because I already had a headache, and...you gotta know me... everytime something bad happens, I remind myself about every other bad thing... likehow some of my friends aren't sure if I'm their friend anymore... and you have no idea how much I want to be their friend, I'm just a retard at keeping friendships... and how highschool is coming and how I'm not going to like it, and eh, some other really bad stuff... I went and took a shower after almost tearfully tellingdad about what mom says, she always says it, you know. He told her when she got back, I was in the shower and she rammed on the door and was like "DID YOU BELIEVE ME?" and then yelled at me... I couldn't really hear what she was saying... but who the hell should be yelling at WHO here?? She left with Teddy...

Dad couldn't do much, but that's okay, he's amazing... he got me food at McDonalds.. not that I was hungry... you know what, mom? Dad will always be my favorite nomatter what the hell you do, or say, he'll always be better than you. Teddy gets fucking straight A's, so I'm the dumbass right? Wrong. I'll prove you wrong, you stupid bitch.

I feel really, really bad saying that, typing it out, but I always think it.

Anyway... art class was fun...

I finished my Grishim book.. the firm... I'm gonna poke around the library in a few minutes, to look for some other Grishim books... because like all things in my room, my other Grishim books have disappeared...

Oh! Lauren and I went downtown yesterday and tried on clothes and stuff... she looks really good. the Gap pants fit her well.. they didn't have longs in a 2:-/... but the Abercrombie pants did, ahh I want them and this one sweater...

Wow, my stomach hurts... grr....

Dad is coming in 15 minutes... ahh I love him so much, if it weren't for him I'd be one of those weird assholes roaming the streets and getting raped and having promiscuous sex... (was that Al that was with me when we yelled that to random college kids? lol that was funny)... speaking of Al (and Shelby and Marlee)... as soon as I get some money I am gonna get those pics developed... haha I'll bet they're hilarious...:-D

I'm gonna go look for some Grishim books now... ta-ta

Liz

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