Here I go-

What's a boyfriend, Nate?

Nothing.

What are friends, may I ask?

Everything.

YOU ALL ARE INCREDIBLE- and I'm not just saying that. Laura, Lauren, Sasha, JORDAN (I feel your pain, man, I'm so sorry), Andrea, Brett, Ivan, Nick, Emily, Abby, Marlee Zack, Conor, Al, Shelby (we're cool- it was so great to hear from her), and, just everyone, I hope I didn't forget you- you all are amazing, thank you SO much.

I don't need him and I NEVER DID. I have these amazing people in my life, I've been single before-

He.Hurt.Me. Horribly. I was crying and shaking (the shaking derived from other depressing matters)- but, I'm strong.

I was looking in the mirror as I was talking to Lauren, and- I thought "Hey, I look pretty right now"- and I realized, I haven't thought very highly of myself in a while, and that's why I was so bitchy to everyone else my insecurities. -

I'm fine- no joke. I suppose I'm a bit depressed here and there- but it's okay, so what if I'm grounded?

I'll find someone else, there are plenty of fish in the sea, God knows there are many good guys at state high.

After he said he didn't think we should go out anymore, much after, he asked "do you want to say that you dumped me?" and I was thinking how much I DIDN'T. If anyone out there knows me, I normally like doing that- but not now, I really did like him for who he was, and - I guess it's just different.

I cried- I got it out- you know, I've never cried over a guy before. Never. I felt like throwing up at a point in time- but I'm not wasting another bodily fluid on him (lol).

I'm slowly coming out of this tunnel and realizing that this was probably for the best. I can be myself again, without a care. I want to earn back all the friends I blew off- they were right, it was about Nate.

Nate says he still wants to be good friends, and hang out and stuff. In due time. He hurt me like no one else has- but I will get over it- in due time.

All the weight is gone- almost, but, well, almost all of it. I feel so clear, and clean, and capable. I'm not tired anymore, I'm not sad.

Was it all him?

It's alright. I'm fine, life is better than ever

Liz

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