DO YOU LIKE MY LAYOUT? I DID IT ALL BY MYSELF

It's part of the "boys" poem that I'm sure all of us can relate to (all us girls who've been fucked over by a guy- which is basically every girl on this earth, unless she's a lesbian, because that's what boys DO.)

Yesterday was alright. I was correct in assuming that mom would take control of things- we didn't get home until midnight or so.

We had a good lunch. We visited grandma. I got some shirts at the outlet mall. Teddy is retarded. Life is good.

Toooday... I'll probably do nothing. Lauren can't do anything, and Laura is stuck cleaning, and, I dunno, maybe I want to sit around and get fatter. School tomorrow, I have homework to do.

OH I have to remind Laura to bring Luke's and Nate's (belated) Christmas gifts. We got Luke a porno-ish magazine, and Nate panty protectors and a Tampax learner's kit

(WOW that's so mean. It's funny, though.)

Bad Things:

I was in Giant Eagle in pittsburgh yesterday (which is like Giant)- and I saw... hearts. Red decorations. Pink cards and candles. And I thought. Valentine's day. Shit. I've always hated valentine's day. Here! Lemme dig into my history in this diary to show you my uh- WONDERFUL v-days that I have had.

I don't have archives of Feb. 2001, but I do remember that I had just moved here, and, well, needless to say- I had no valentine.

Feb 2002. THIS ONE SUCKED. You can't even imagine how horrible this Valentine's day was... well, I can't copy and paste for some reason- but, Lindsay Auman picked a fight with me, Ivan asked out Abbie again (after assuring me that me and him were just "on a break), and- the day just sucked. Of course I had no valentine.

And, I never have had a valentine. I've gotten cards and well wishes and hugs from friends- while I'd watch the happy couples- the successful couples be...coupley. Let's see if I can remember 6th grade. I like Adam Harbuagh or Chris Salera or someone, and I didn't care that much... I mean, it sucked and all but the only thing I wanted at the time was to hang out with Maria and Em. V-day was never a big deal.

Yeah... but I saw those damn flowers and the stupid pink and purple decorations and cards in the display. As sad as this is, I thought about Nate... honestly, I really thought we were going to be together then, and now- obviously. I never thought that we'd be together "forver and ever", or anything childish like that, but it felt as if it was really going to work- like it wasn't some stupid middle school relationship.

I know, I've said this many times over. It still doesn't do justice to how I feel.

It's getting better, though. I don't think about him as much anymore. I find other things to occupy myself and I have great friends who are there for me, ...so getting over him has, yeah, it's been tough- but not impossible.

Speaking of boys- Nick is all mad at me. I told him, after he explained himself, that he's not really my type (and, I still really want to be friends with him)- but nah, he's mad at me. Oh well. Maybe I'll just let this go, maybe he'll get over it and we can be friends again- he was great to talk to.

I hope we actually have school tomorrow. I hate snow days, because you can't go anywhere (the roads are bad) so you sit around and do nothing- and THEN- we have to make the days up over the summer when we could be at the pool, or at a friend's house, or downtown, at a movie, at tussey, out of town, (vacation), basking in the sun, playing a game, playing sports- anything you could do in the summer! There are very few things you can do in the winter when the roads are horrible and you can go almost nowhere.

So. School tomorrow would be nice.

I'm hungry and I have homework..much love-

Liz

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