I always read everyone's diaries before I update mine.

If you're on my list and you updated recently, I've read it.

Reading what everyone is writing, how mature they all sound...it made me think. Really think.

We're growing up so fast. We're growing up together. Our lives are intertwined, and although many of us are not close friends, some don't even like each other, we're all here. We're the class of 2006 and we've already seen so many days together- the good, the bad, the ugly.

Things change so fast, so, incredibly fast... not only on the outside, but the inside. It amazes me. How much we've learned and grew, how close we've become to even those we dislike. We have a common ground, a common mentality, and we all grow next to each other. Going through different experiences, meeting new people, then introducing those people to your other friends.

No one can bail out now... we have our set friends, I feel sorry for anyone who has just..left. Joined a new crowd. I mean totally new crowd (nothing like my "new group" escapades)... unrelated to any of our roots. Think about it, this is us, we're going to graduate together and we still have 2 and a half years to have the most amazing and hurtful times together, or apart, yet still close by.

This is why I always feel so wrong with new people who I barely know. I always need some comfort there.

I feel so incredibly close to the people I went to Park Forest with. The ones I drifted away from, the ones I wasn't ever friends with, and the ones I've fought with numerous times- It still feels as if we have a common base that nobody else has, because.. Park Forest was special. (this is not to say Mount Nittany wasn't). But... knowing them in middle school.. it means more than you'd think it would. Even if you were never friends. I have a greater appreciation for these people, even if they were never there for me. They're part of my past- a past of no regrets.

Everyone's diaries brought that on... how mature and almost grown-up you all sound, it really made me think. Wow. My class is growing up, we're learning to drive, some of us have jobs, ...we're gonna go out into the real world in not such a long time. I need to cherish the time I have wtih them while I still can.

Anyway... life has been good lately. I've been very chill about almost everything, except for one topic, being boys, of course.

I don't know what I want. Well.

I want someone to take my breath away, to captivate me, to make me not want anyone else.

That's soulmate material right there, and I shouldn't expect it in highschool, I know. And I really try not to. Sometimes I feel as if I'm wasting my time on something if I see it going nowhere amazing. And sometimes I think, why the hell not, it'd be fun, just wing it and have a good time. So, I guess we will see what I decide to do. Hopefully I'll quit stressing and just accept what is there.

Everything else is really chill... crazy amounts. Well. Saturday night I stayed in, it was cool, watched TV and had a grand old in night.

Sunday I went to Jess's and we dyed my hair... I had wanted to put crazy 'rocker chick' white blonde highlights in, but I didn't, I just left it the slightly darker color it had become with the dye.

We had to get up around 9/10 ish and go downtown in search of a dress for Jess. She found a really nice one at Mr. Charles. I got incense, rings and hemp and Artifax... I LOVE that store. I may have just spelled it wrong, but that's alright... I could spend forever in there, it's so awesome.

Jess had some things to do during the day, and I went to Andrea's with Nate. (whitmer, haha. i don't even talk to nate westrick). anyhow...we went to George's house, wow, Chris... CRAZY kid. I love him! hahahah. And that other Nate guy who Andrea thinks is hot, and some other guy, and Vince and Nikki. Well, Nate, Andrea and I drove off for a bit and had a LOT of fun, then came back and Chris was STILL there ( aaaahahahah ). We chilled for a while then went back to Andrea's where I did something stupid and still feel bad about it! Nate doesn't though!

This week has been good. Track has left my legs very sore... but a good sore. An "I worked out" sore.

I suppose I should go work on my homework. I don't have too much tonight. Well, I have a good amount in World History, and only a little in other classes...but what should I expect really, she assigns work as if we have no other classes to worry about.

If I finish my work tonight, I may start on a hemp necklace... just a plain one, something that I can tye on and wear with everything.

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