oh shoot-

i wonder why she put that link on her diary. Maybe to show me and everyone else how horrible I really was to her. That was actually smarter than saying a string of swear words about me.

hmm.

i deleted it, because ... i don't know, maybe because i don't want all of that on my diary, i think I'll delete all those foul entries about her.... because they're wrong. Or I'll move them to threalizzles, either one.

I swear, I was going to have a heart attack. My heart was beating so hard and so fast---- honestly, i was scared. I still feel shook

that was a great (and clean on your part) way to show me that I really was wrong, and trust me, I wasn't in my right mind

I'm not doin the 'richard Baumhammers' thing, I'm doing the 'I was scared of getting hurt' thing, but it blew up in my face as it usually does.

i mean, I was putting a sheil of cuss words and masks of carelessness over me, but deep down I still cared about maria, emily, alex, everyone in usc so much that i was willing to lose it all just so i could forget... just so i wouldn't miss them, because it stabs like a knife, just the thought of how my life used to be. you know what, I'm going to go delete all those not-so-nice entries in my diary, because they're just degrading to me and mean to everyone else.

so here I am, now for the first time, changing for the better.

0 comments so far