Hmm.. okay, just got up.. I'm not a huge fan of writing one entry after the other, normally wait a day, otherwise noone reads the previous entry and I feel bad for it:-/...

Spaz is now nibbling on my foot. Earlier I hit his head in attempts to make him quit biting me, but apparently he did not get it. Maybe I should tell him not to? Silly me, cat's don't speak english, they speak Cat....

I just noticed how horrible my grammar is. I plan on being in advanced english next year, but I totally lost all writing skills whatsoever... I used to be decent at it, but now I kinda suck... or maybe I don't suck, and thinking that way will make me suck. Y'know, psychology plays a role in everything...

I remember that one night many a moon ago... yes, I was thinking about this the other day, being yesterday, because this was the only time that kind of thing actually worked for me... uh, read about it here.

It'a about 10:20 now and I swear I hear footsteps downstairs... or maybe that's just my random musing.

You know what I think is crazy? How long I've had this diary... I even have a link in my little clicky thing at the bottom to an older.html archive for a year ago... just to see what I was like.

Well, what was I like? Mmm. Lemme go to an entry on this date a year ago... and give you an idea...

"I might still like him. My 'head chunk' is taking over, slowly but steadily and eating all remorse and just whatever i thought was weird or confusing is hopefully going away

but I don't like him as much as i used to

and It's kind of sad, I've had this thing for him for a pretty long time."

Chris Salera. Wwhhiippeedd. It was insane, I thought I was in love with that kid. I dunno what was up with me-

I always try to psychoanalyze myself, to see why I am the way I am, or why I think or do the things I do... and sometiems I come up with a plausable answer and I think... "Yes! That's it, why didn't this occur to me before?" and, sometimes I can't think of a reason, and become frustrated. I wonder if I ever came to the conclusion that some things are better left unkown... and that it's probably a good thing for me not to know what I'm all about, because then I'd be boring to myself... you know what I mean? We're all stuck with ourselves for a while, we may as well like what we've got.

It's about 10:30 now... I haven't done any random morning rants in a while...

I wonder how Maria is doing in Alaska...

Joanna and Ivan... mmm...

Shelby and Phil and Marlee and Lee must be very happy.. brothers and best friends, that's gotta be the life...

I wonder how Al and Zack are? As far as I could see, they were good.

Me and noone... going to highschool with noone... personal prefferance.

Highschool! This might sound sort of shallow... or, maybe stupid... haha, but as soon as I start school shopping it really dawns on me that school is actually coming rather soon and I get flustered.

I like that word. Flustered.

Max and Andrea are going out... was kinda inevitable, y'know? I remember before I went out with him, people were asking him like "Wouldn't you and Andrea look good together? Yes, go out with her"... and such. It made me mad because I still liked him and stuff... but then, we went out and then ended it and we are rather very much better off as friends. Maybe we can go back to the way things were when we'd talk about random things and... well, our personalities matched better back then, I dunno about now... things seem so odd sometimes.

Abbie got her hair dyed purple and black... it should be really amazing

Something Max said last night really got to me... he asked me, "why do you want to be exactly like Abbie?"

Honestly, I don't know how to start, but I feel a rant coming on... not that this whole entry isn't one or anything...:-P

Abbie. I like hanging out with her and I like that sometimes some of the things I say or do resemble something that she would say or do, but that doesn't mean I want to be her clone, or her shadow... All of my friends have great qualities and bad qualities... I mean, Abbie makes fun of the Steelers and various other things that I like or have to do with me, and sometimes doesn't know when to stop, and that makes me angry sometimes... but it's not that big of a deal... like I said, everyone has bad qualities and if they were a big deal I wouldn't want to hang out with them... Plus, I'm all for the "be your own person" thing... I wear clothes and say things and do stuff that I know in a million years Abbie would never do... like some tight little white pants I got in pittsburgh... so Liz, not Abbie. I'm not sure if Max is the only one that thinks that I want to be just like her, or if he came to that conclusion with the help of others, and he's the only one with the audacity to ask me... either way, I hope whoever thinks that way doesn't anymore. Or, maybe you can go on believing it, but how could you go on calling yourself my friend?

I don't even know who I am talking to there... it might be to noone. Hmm.

it's only about 10:40 and I've already had my first angry rant... I kinda wanted to get in the shower by 11... hmm... I'm hungry...

Camp today... once it is over I can actually hang out with people... like go to the pool and stuff... I miss going to the pool... and even if noone invites me or says they are going, me and Teddy will probably go to Welch (Welsch? Welsh?) by ourselves... I wanna get tan, and I think he is tired of sitting around all day.

Mom finished with The Street Lawyer and now she is reading The Brethren which is the one I am trying to read... she reads very fast...

This entry is way too long... I'm off

Liz

0 comments so far