My biggest woes right now
are in eBay.
So, I got an account on Christmas eve- deciding that maybe I could get Matt's gift on there for cheap, and plus I've always wanted an account anyway, you can get some SWEET stuff for really low prices.
I get an account and I put in a search for "The Godfather"- cos he likes that movie- and I come up with ...two things. a vintage 1972 poster for 3.99, and the DVD set that is USUALLY 50.00 in stores- for 25.00. and I was like, oh rock on, instant christmas gift. Especially because no one else had bid on anything.
In a matter of hours, I had won the poster. I got all kinds of excited and went to the site to pay for it. I filled out all the forms then put my card number in and it declined it. I figured I had done something wrong then tried it a few more times. I got frustrated and told Dad, who let me use his card. It didn't work either. I copy down his card number and give it back to him, and continue trying his and my cards, alternating.
After two days it is still not working and I am frustrated. Dad comes in with the Big Wallet- every credit card him and mom have.
None work. We must have gone through 10+ cards, just trying and trying, and to each, the site said "Your Card Has Been Declined".
!
And I get really upset and tell Matt about it, except not what it is, and he's all "WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO BUY?" and won't let it rest when I tell him it's something for my room, because it very well could be!
I mean, so what if it's really for HIS room....
I have only a matter of hours before I win the DVDs.
Anyway, yesterday was cool. I worked Andrea's shift from 8-2, and Laura and I were the only cashiers for a while. Dave replaced her after a while and I talked to him... the Day family is coooool.
I'm SO!! Excited!! For my New Years party!! It's going to be small of course, I was only allowed to invite very few people- and party planning sucks sometimes, cos if you want to invite like...certain people, you have to invite certain numbers of their friends, or they won't go, or they'll not have fun, or something. Soooo if anyone is reading this (which is doubtful)- and you weren't invited, trust me, I want you there...everyone knows how I love throwing huge parties...but, my limit was 8.
Which will be pushed a bit I think
so far, it's me, Matt (who don't count in the 8 people), Jessie shall come after her mitch ness, Jess Thorpe, JuliannDave, Laura Rubin and a friend who is male, Johnny Au, Robert possibly, Lauren Machon, Laura Day HOPEFULLYY, Andrea and Lance might stop by, Sarah Fay and Lauren might stop by
haha speaking of Sarah Fay and Lauren- I talked to Sarah AND Lauren the other day, and each of them were like "_______ told me that Matt cheated on you with like 8 girls, I'm sooo sorry! She also told us that Caitlin gives him head alllll the time and she told us this and that and this"
Alright you- you know who you are. I know you absolutely cannot live without the dramatic attention, but could you PLEASE not use my issues, my life, and please do NOT spread false rumors about my boyfriend. Keep to the suicide comments. Those didn't hurt anyone.
Anyway, back to yesterday. Work ended at 2, then Dad and I went to the Y with Jessie. We ran and did abs and lifted- and laughed about our last time there when we saw Nick and he told Jessie that when she worked out, it made him horny....
Then I went home. Talked on the phone a little, and then to church.
Haha I saw James, who liked my sparkly belt.
I decided that since everyone and their mom now has a studded belt- the trend's over, and...you'll see... sparkly belts.
even if it DOESN'T become a trend, I have an eye for this kind of stuff. I love my sparkly belt.
Then I went home and was hassled to do health, and Jessie wanted to go see a movie. Mom decided to let me go if I finished enough of my health, so we decided to see Meet the Fockers- and I ran to go work on my health, haha I SPED through it. Jessie came by and we left, with me just barely getting it all done- but I did!
Meet the Fockers was really funny... it was all about sex and it made me miss sex a lot.
***
So, I'm looking back at this entry and realizing how...not deep it is. I keep thinking about Jes Rodabaugh's diary and how she writes about things that mean a lot to her and you can always tell she's thinking. I have a notebook on my bed for that- I just can't be comfortable writing about how I really feel in here. Sometimes I can, but not often. Sometimes I wish my diary were more like Jes's, and sometimes I think that writing about day-by-day things is quite alright and I have nothing to prove to anyone.
My legs are hairy like a man's.
I work a lot this week cos we're going to Pittsburgh next week, and that means Urban Outiftters on the southside that Andrea told me about..YIPPEEEE!!
Tomorrow I think I'm going to the Lemonsoul/Percival Madison/this other band concert- it's going to be sweet, I think I'm going with Anna and Jessie, assuming Jessie can go. We might meet up with Jen too.
My ticket to leave the house is to do health. So I'll do that and maybe I will be allowed to go? I hope so!
It sucks though that Lemonsoul goes on at 10:30 and I REALLY want to see them- of course, I'm not driving so whatever- either I find a late ride home or dad comes and gets me before Lemonsoul even begins. We'll see.
So, I guess I haven't much else to talk about.
I miss Matt more than I've ever missed anyone. It's worse at night, when I get to laying on my bed, staring at the pictures of us, and waiting for him to call/talking to him. So many weird ways of expressing how I miss him crawl through my head, but they're too oddly shakespeare-sounding for me to ever say them. I just miss him. A lot.
I look at the picture of us, with our hair wet after the jacuzzi on my birthday. I want so badly to be back in there, to kiss him, to play with and smell his hair, to put my head on his shoulder and my hands on his hips-
And nobody besides my close friends know what's really going on. Everyone, because of a jealous, attention craving person- thinks that Matt is a nasty asshole, a chain cheater, someone who has no consideration for me...but he does.
I'm so tired...back to sleep

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