My cat went through heat once. She sat in a corner, festered and squirmed, wanting to get out there into the world so badly. But she knew she'd never find a way. Which, realistically, made it ten times worse.

I look at pictures of New York and feel like that cat. I fantasize. I think about how being in New York makes me feel. I fall in love. The huge sidewalks, the boutiques,...the feeling in the air. I can't express enough, I can't do justice to how badly I want to live there after highschool.

and then I sit here and have bad grades and realize, that I've got this big dream, and the time is NOW to do something about it.

I wish there was a Penn State New York. That would make everything much easier.

Matt left for Florida this morning. He stopped by my house at like 7 am to say bye. It was really nice. I've talked to him numerous times throughout the day, he's called me from airports and whatnot. He gets back on Friday night, but I'll be in Pittsburgh. Motherfucker. I don't want to go, but I don't really want to stay with anyone here- because the only reason I want to stay here is to see Matt, work, and tan. My friends could only tan with me, unless they wanted to hang out with Matt's friends, and I doubt they'd want to do that for a long period of time.

I'm going to go to work early today I guess, cos mom lost me two days of work. She won't buy me anything anymore so I have to work for money, and then she tells me I can't work. Arrg.

0 comments so far